I am just five years away from being an empty nester. In my reflective moments I can feel the quiet approaching. An ever expanding space with more time and lesser demands.

And I have already started preparing for that phase almost without realizing it.

Although, I do know life will throw a googly and all my plans will come crashing. But at least I would not be caught unawares and be able to pivot if I am already planning for it.

#1. Finding more time to work

As I was saying, I have already started sub-consciously preparing for it. I realized this a couple of months after I actually began. Because one fine morning, while reviewing my monthly accomplishments, I noticed incremental changes in my behaviour and hence routine.

Till a couple years ago, I could never find a rhythm or regularity in my work schedule. But now I am able to sit down to work at the scheduled time more frequently.

And in the past five months, I have been able to stick to my schedule 3-4 out of five days. This has been possible because I have made it a point not to stray by more than maybe 15 or 20 minutes. And had the bandwidth to stick to it.

#2. Building a fictional future

Two, subconsciously I have already started considering what I want to be doing once the not-so-little one is also off to college and I have more time at hand. It was really a no-brainer for me: write fiction full-time.

Which means I have five years to build my portfolio of projects and passive income to a level that allows me to do exactly that — start writing for 3-4 hours per day without thinking of anything else.

#3. Making most of digital workstyle

The question here is: where do I want to stay? Yeah this is something I have been thinking of for years.

Bokaro is not good for my physical health. So do I want to move? I’m considering this question because now I can. The only thing tying me down to this place was my kids’ studies and now if they are off to someplace else then I’m sure I can also consider moving.

But I find this kind of funny too. My *bhabhi (*sister-in-law) **wants to settle down in Bokaro once their prime working years are over! Grass being greener on the other side and all.

Which begs the question, where? Now, that place has to be somewhere that is warm. Mountains and hills are not for me because my bones will not be able to sustain either the weather or the terrain. Ideally I would love to settle in a coastal area, near the sea. It will be warm through the year, or at least not cold for months on end. Plus there is something in the vast expanse of water and the waves that call to me.

#4. Building a real business

Four, I never got to build a business like a business should be built. With single-minded focus and attention. Due to other responsibilities that took precedence. And rightly so.

But now I am trying to pour myself into building something I had wanted to years ago. Owing to decades of practice balancing work and life, I am now compartmentalizing my business and personal work nicely. Silos are not always bad, see?

Moreover, personal responsibilities are now not as all-consuming and overwhelming as they used to be, say five years ago. And will continue south in terms of both quantity and intensity.

This also makes me realize how all-consuming “active” motherhood can be. When the kids live at home and your thoughts, hours and identity are sucked by them.

It makes me want to reiterate that as a society we need to do much much much more to support young mothers. But that’s a conversation for another day.

Leaning into a life of exploration, not routine

I love routines. Habits. Schedules.

Because they have always given a semblance of order to an otherwise chaotic life. When I started working, routines enabled me to work more, learn more and live life the way I wanted. Post motherhood my days have been defined by kids’ daily routines, school pickups, tuitions, hobby classes and birthday invitations.

Going forward I would like to replace that with personal rituals I have always dreamt of – long walks, uninterrupted reading times, leisurely hours spent doing nothing but thinking, gardening, hanging out with friends, travelling, exploring and more.

But you know what, that switch cannot be flipped in a day. One day the kiddo leaves and from the next day I have all these things in my calendar. Nope, not happening.

That’s why I need to start on all front soon. Really soon. Because habits and hobbies take time to build

“The empty nest is underrated.”

Nora Ephron